A Black Bone To Pick With You

As I have aged my hands have become darker with more lines and etchings of time. Not that I was ever a redbone or a cream coffee or even carmel; I was just a lighhter brown.

Does it bother me that my melatin seems to be going to the darker side of the spectrum with age? No. That is the least of my worries. I use to hear as a small child the darker the berry the sweeter the juice as all of the men ran after the 'high yellow' girls and the other black girls of the south tried to stay out of the sun so they would not become darker. So I knew some one was lying with the darker the berry line.

Why am I bringing this all up you may wonder. Well, are you wondering? Good. My first goal met.

I had the pleasure of meeting two well put together dark sisters last week. The first I shared a seat with on a shuttle and she somehow just began to tell me how offended she and her family were by the movie the "Help" because her grandmother and aunt were teachers in Mississippi during that time of the 1960's and her family were never maids.

Oh, I had met this type before. Ashamed. Angry. How dare you think my family ever cleaned for whites while that same lifestyle exists for Mississipians in 2012. Self important, yet irrelevant in the scope of the world, the movie was not about your family. It was about a point in time in which many people lived and suffered. Wonder than since her family were 'learned' did they help the Freedom Riders so they could vote? But, I don't get into scuffels with those who become angry when blacks are portrayed as slaves or less than human.

My next lady, well we had been joking and talking for hours. We were friendlier strangers. Then I said, The one thing I've been waiting to do and will accomplish in 2012 is tracing my family line back to Africa using genetics. She looked at me and said "My family is 1, 2, 3, 9, generations removed from slavery. I will never trace back to Africa." She seemed snappish, upset, ignorant because my mother, nor grandmother, were slaves and I loved learning genealogy as I had explained and could not wait to know what tribe I belonged to or what area of Africa my maternal ancestors originated.
                                                  
Africans think black Americans are not black enough and have sold out and black Americans seem to not feel any connection accept denial of Africa. What is wrong?

I wanted to label or title this blog Black Confusion or Hate because the lines have blurred.

Are black people so broken until we have a battle with the darkness, lightness, origin, occupation, remembramce of our liineage, or forgetfulness of our struggles for freedom? Do we just have a problem with BLACKNESS?
                                                          
Has the definition been so harsh of the word 'black' until there is not a definition we can agree on what it means to be the RIGHT BLACK? Who is keeping score and what is the reward, because it is WE tearing each other down for not being a correct black.

I don't know. We say it is 'them' or 'they' who hate black people. But, I say 'we' are doing a pretty good job of it too.

So, this is my black bone I have to pick with black people. Do we love our blackness? Or do we love our own definition of what BLACK means to each of us?     

Money Talks

There are many Bible passages that have been misquoted over and over again and one Bible misquote I have heard often is: "The love of money is evil." We may say we see the damage the love of money has manifested in the lives of celebrities and everyday people we come into contact with in our lives. But, I still would like to clear up the misquote and set the record straight. "The love of money is the ROOT of ALL evil" 1 Timothy 6:10.

With the addition of the word 'root' and 'all' our perception of money should change and we should guard ourselves from the pitfalls that the love of money brings. Many people are in an uproar, not because they are dirt poor, but because they have decreased a level or two in their economic soundness. Anyone who tries to convince you that poverty is fun would probably benefit from some sort of professional counseling. But, when we allow our financial state to determine our amount of joy in life as a whole, then we must look at what defines our happiness.

While thinking about money and the way we depend upon it and use it, I wondered was there a difference in the way women used money and the way men used money. And the answer is a resounding yes. I found there are 5 top ways each sex use their money (after taking care of the basic necessities that are common to both sexes such as rent and food) and found the differences a little eye opening.

MEN: Men don’t spend, they invest. Men don’t want something, they need it. Theirs is a future-money orientation. Men are trained to fix and provide, so they view money as a means to capture and accumulate things to add more value.

Men will spend their money on investments, entertainment, women/online dating/love, hobbies and sports, and betting and gambling.

WOMEN: Women are trained to nurture and seek acceptance and so view money as a means to create a lifestyle. Women spend on things that enhance day-to-day living. Theirs is a now-money orientation. Women are the collectors of stuff and are taught that what they need to get through life is approval. They have to look good, act good and be good.

An average woman will spend 8.5 years of her life shopping. So you guessed it, shopping tops the list of how and where women spend their money. Next we have beauty, health and fitness, love/online dating, and funishings.

There you have it. Each of the sexes have distinct spending habits to which the marketing masses can target each of the sexes in specific ways. Our purchases are the fruit that are springing forth from the branches of a root. Remember the LOVE of money is the ROOT evidenced and so I ask does our purchases serve as an indicator of our EVIL? For the man would it be the deep need for more and more money and for the woman would it be the purchase of unending beauty?

With more and more money men become more and more powerful actually buying people's opinion and loyalty; obtaining the perfect trophy wife and trading her in when she no longer fits the bill. Men even become workaholics to the neglect of wife and children. Notice gambling creeps into the bootom of the list; a force of distruction.

With more money women spend countless thousands for the perfect nose, smile, breast, butt, tummy and the list goes on and on what a woman is willing to do to her body surgically to obtain the idea of youthful beauty. When a woman will inject a poison into her face in an effort not to have wrinkles; then you know just how important beauty is to her. Not only is she interested in being beautiful, she is interested in being surrounded in beauty. I have never ceased to be amazed at a group of women telling each other how many men they are dating and which bill the man is paying freeing up money to get her hair and nails done.

Well, I have not escaped that statistic of 8.5 years of shopping. I have a love of shoes and I have contributed to the millions the make-up industry pulls in yearly. We often want to be equal to men in all things. Do we want the men's top 5 to be ours? Do we want to trade an obsession for beauty with an obsession for status?

As a group (women) we are saying alot when we are not even giving a clear voice to a subject. Our spending habits speak for us and I do not know if we are purposefully driving what our voice is saying. As I said, businesses and services follow our spending trends and cater to those statistical needs. Our spending power influences society. Our use of money actually speaks volumes about our heart. We ask everyone to see us as a serious player in the world, but someone who is so focused on looks and overall appearances may not feel capable or worthy if she doesn't look just so. Is the fruit of our root beauty alone?

   

Crime Scene Investigator

Star Trek has followers known as Trekkies and Rush Limbaugh has ditto heads, but I"m not sure if there is a name for me and my obsession; if it is an obsession.

I guess my problem began at the first BONG in the lead in music to Law & Order. It is recognized by all. I watched the original series and was one of those who tuned in to see what was happening in the lives on the streets.

My love for a good crime story was later fueled by the Steven Tyler like scream that followed the red haired man as he put his trademark shades on in the hit show CSI:Miami. The late night comedians would have their fill of making jokes at the red haired man who promised to find the killer, but the t.v. show's ratings proved; we believed his promises and held on to the end until he delivered.

I would graduate from just finding a killer with random bits of DNA left behind to profiling the killer by looking at victim's positions or the material the killer read or music he listened to. I fell in love with Criminal Minds.

These shows began to infiltrate my life. I found myself wanting to seek justice for the people who cried victim in my everyday circle. I walked into places and took note of areas that would be great potentials for harvesting DNA. Oh, yeah, doorknobs were the first thing I noticed entering and exiting buildings. Cups behind left next to chairs would send someone up river fast. Later, I began to notice people's mannerisms wondering what kind of childhood trauma they had suffered and what kind of people they would probably kill.

I became the number one investigator in my home. If my husband lost his keys, I would almost seal off a crime scene, look for witnesses to question, and go through his daily habits. When I ventured outside for exercise, I looked at tire tracks and insect markings trying to determine who-what-when the perp had been in the vicinity.

I honed these skills telling my family how valuable they will be if there was a war or some kind of natural dissaster. I believe my crime solving skills will be valuable for foraging for food or for supplies to survive. I also think my hightened knowledge of criminals will help me know who to trust and who will cut off my head for a candy bar if the times called for it.

For all of you thinking I have lost touch with reality, let me assure you this post is just in fun and is intended to pay homage to the great crime shows; which I do love.

Television has allowed us to step into places and careers we only dare dream about. The downfall is when we really believe we are qualified to inform and assist others in these fields when we do not have the proper training. I can speak the lingo of an investigator and impress maybe a handful of people, but I know; that is as far as I can go and want to go in a field that deals with criminals.

As with politics, many of us have become armchair politicians and sad to say we think we have expertise in many other fields as well. But just as I have acknowledged my lack of qualifications as a CSI agent, hopefully we give politicians a break, ministers a break, and others who have chosen a career we all believe we can do better or are quickly to give advice to.

Hopefully our access to information on the television and computers will be used wisely making us smarter but not dumb enough to lead us to believe we can know everything.

JOE BIDEN AND JOAN RIVERS ARE TWINS!!!

Of course they are not twins. But they do share something that I know all can agree on: YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT WILL COME OUT OF THEIR MOUTHS.

No matter what these two peole say, you just shake your head, drop your head so no one can see, and grin or try to hold back a smile or laugh. This unpredictability seems to endear them more and more to people. I know people are shaking their heads and saying "No real Christian will ever admit Joan Rivers is funny because she uses such foul language." Well, she is foul, but she is still funny. SORRY There are a lot of people in your family who are foul but are the family's favorite person. Hate the sin; not the sinner.

My dear Vice President has a mouth that can fix itself to say the most surprising things; that everyone has just come to know and expect of him. Why am I talking about Joe Biden and his infamous SLIPS? Notice where our vice president is while this tragedy is playing out in the United States: Afghanastan and Pakistan. I believe it is far better for him to be there than here, because he is apt to say anything.

One thing we do know about Joe Biden is that he takes his role of father very seriously and to have an innocent congresswoman and nine year old girl shot; Joe would have definitely been primed to let his loose lips fly.

Our dear Apostle Paul can be put into this unpredictable category. Peter chimed up that he would never be one of those to deny Jesus. Okay, big foot in mouth time. Peter jumped up with sword/knife in hand cutting off the ear of a man who had come to arrest Jesus. Peter was rebuked for his action publicly by Jesus and the man with the missing ear was restored. Peter was the brave one who jumped off of the boat to walk on the water to meet Jesus only to sink in fornt of all of his peers as his exuberance waned. But, this same impulsive person, Jesus would give the keys to the future church.

Oh Joan, Joe, and Peter; our lives would be so boring without you all. I admit you all are too much for my Christian constitution, but, if I am to be salt and light, then I guess you all are some kind of peppery spice and lightening.

For Colored Girls; a window into the soul

Movie critic Alynda Wheat of People Magazine, Nov. 15, 2010 said that the movie For Colored Girls "...fueled a dangerous fallacy that black women are perpetual victims and black men border on villainous...I can't help but wish those tales were better told, and with something resembling hope." I couldn't disagree with her more.

When the movie "Precious" came out a relative of mine said she was embarrased for white people to see the movie. She said now they think we are all like that. I told her from my view of the world many families are hiding abuse of various kinds from numerous people behind closed doors and society tells them your story is too horrid for us to deal with. Keep it to yourself. All that is needed for evil to win is for good people to do nothing. Just think, if someone else's reality is too crude for you, think how difficult that reality it to live in. The shame and guilt must be overwhelming.

People have many opinions and are willing to share them (i.e. me). There are those who believe people should only adopt children of the same race. One psychologist stated "If you do not have people that look different than you, or people who look like the adopted child at your dinner table regularly, then maybe it would not be a good idea to adopt a child of a different race." I think that is something to consider. Bottom line is there are so many children waiting to be adopted into a loving family that race should not be the deciding factor.

I have also had the delightful opportunity for people that are not of my race or my religious denomination to explain my race and particular denomination to me. They give me the history and how the mind set of African Americans developed and how and why my denomination came about and MY way of worshipping. Now, these particular people are proud of their understanding of various ethnicities and denominations and they should be. I applaud them for even having a superficial understanding, but no one knows better than the source. We should not let our academia and observation form our conclusions about others because God is the master of individuality.

I have heard in the last two years many Christians express their disappointment at black Christians for voting for Obama as they say "Just because he is black." I have heard pleas from AFR (American Family Radio) hosts for black people to call in and 'explain' why they would vote for Obama and against God. My thought would drift to "They obviously do not have any close black friends to ask this question and if they do have balck friends, then they may not be as close as they think they are because black people are cautious who they let in to the true mind of a black person as are other ethnicities" BELEIVE IT. We all keep secrets from one another based on ethnicity and even gender.

There is a certain code of silence in all ethnicities. The book "Black Like Me" really relays this fact in the black community as a white man living as a black man diacovers. Many of my close white friends have told me that conversations are different when only Caucasians are present and the reply is 'ditto' for all ethnicities. WHY AM I SAYING ALL OF THIS YOU MAY ASK?

Because of the movie "For Colored Girls" This movie took the lid off of the human experience and exposed all of its ugliness in delicate penetrating poetic artistry. All of the complexities of existence were boldly tackled. The human response to pain and reaching a point of saying 'No more' screamed its way off of the movie screen. SECRETS that cross all walks of life and must be denied at all cost. THIS MOVIE ENTERED THE REALM OF LIES THAT SAY:"These are the problems only THEY have"

The movie wasn't intended to spin a tale it was an attempt to let people in on what takes a person to the brink of suicide a place all people say they would not go, but when the constant drum beat of life deals you less than roses and fairy tale endings that are promised you are left with... WHAT? Those on the outside looking in do not have the scars of the mounting assault. They come in fresh at your end point. they say "There was a better solution." But in these tales of these women on the big screen, we wanted to flee from their lives, we wanted to scream, to lash out, everything but LIVE in it till the rainbow came with a happy ending. Suicide is not the final and best answer for any problem, but what about those people who come to that place and yet have to tell others of this terrible ordeal that words cannot adequatly describe. Pats on the back and future promises seem out of reach or else those suffering surely would have reached them already. The movie delivered on its promise for me "Pain exists, cruelty exists, brokeness exists, and there are many people in that phase of living."

Tyler Perry's movie was intermingled with sheer unabated searing pain but had shadows of laughter masterfully interjected. Those who entered the movie theater to be entertained, came face to face with at least one familiar life situation or one familiar character. People laughed at the images of self in similar situations, they ohhed and awwed at the snatch of the heart the presence of the black male induced, and cringed at the tumble we take when it all comes crashing down or crashing in.

People who want to understand people across racial lines and within racial lines must see this movie. it was not just the experience of colored girls. When you seek to know the 'whys' behind a person's actions think about the pain behind some of those actions. The women in this movie were pushed; some by their own self inflicted wrong decisions and some just victims of another's damaged life and mind.

Each woman in that theater watching those lives careen out of control and finally to some liveable conclusion, could relate. I would love to be in an audience of all white women to see their reactions. I would love to sit in an audience of Hispanics to see their response to the movie. I believe womanhood shares something that goes beyond ethnicity. The characters and their experience were situations faced by many women whether anyone is willing to admit it or not.

There are many war vets returning home right now and many families in chaos this very day. Suicides are on the rise and yet movie critics want a hopeful ending? Someone has to show some reality sooner or later.

The poem on the rapist was beyond description. What happens to the psychi of the woman who does everything right and yet everything can go so horribly wrong. the poem said she was gaurding herself against the stranger and it was the friend she let in that caused her harm. What hopefulness is there for her? Women are raped by people they know all of the time and have the hardest time convincing others it was an assault because they KNEW them. Where are the roses and happy endings for this truth?
The dualing poems on 'I know you' and 'You don't know me" were masterful. women date men and make them into the men they would like them to be in their minds. A cool aloof man who lacks intimacy is labeled the strong silent type. We hang in there to be the ONE he opens up to and he moves on before he opens up. They tell you they they have a quick temper and we say he is so jealous with a giggle as if that is a true sign of love. We don't KNOW half of the people we deal with and are surprised when things go wrong. I always tell my daughters "Believe a person when they tell you they are crazy; they probabley are."

This is a movie for generation after generation of women to share. Don't just watch it, discuss it with your daughters and the men in your lives. Heal and be prepared to heal as life presents the opportunity. Closing your eyes and saying that could never be me allows it to be you. formulate your plan for life and these cruel situations as best you can so you can do your best to have that hopeful ending.

Names Of God Sufficeint for all our needs

Every once in a while I like to remind myself of all of the names of God. He has so many because He is all things, intimate and personal for us. Sometimes our prayers or as Israel used to do: our "cries" to the Lord need to be as specific as when Jesus called Lazarus to arise from the dead. If Jesus would have said "man come forth" the tomb would have emptied of all of its dead men. God said come boldly to His throne and we can also come specifically to his throne.

http://www.child-bible-lessons.com/names-of-God.html (source of the names of God)

Why do we have different names of God? When we pray or refer to God it is usually as the Lord, God or our Father. But did you know that God actually refers to Himself in the Bible with other titles? There are many Hebrew names that are linked to the specific circumstances of how God is revealing His power and glory to His people.

The Lord's name stands in for His purpose, reflecting His qualities,character and attributes. For instance, if we are praying for a healing we would use the title Jehovah-Rophe or Jehovah-Rapha,"the Lord God heals".(Psalm 147:3)God wants to heal not only our sicknesses and physical health but also our emotional health or even our 'land' can be healed.

'Rapha' means restoring something to it's normal state. Another of the names of God we call on is El Roi. We use this name if we are seeking God to open our eyes and reveal to us that even though men may not see our good deeds, God sees it all. El Roi or "the God of seeing" means God sees the afflictions or suffering of His people and if we humble ourselves and call on Him, He will come to our aid.(Hebrews 2:18)

God is also referred to as the Jehovah-Sabaoth or the Lord of Hosts which is the title of "the Commander to the Angelic Host and the Armies of God". We may call on Jehovah-Sabaoth if we have lost all hope and are defenseless and in trouble, feeling trapped like we have an army of enemies surrounding us on all sides.(Isaiah 36-37).

As you can see, we use the specific names quite frequently to help us in our current circumstances. If we are having difficulties making ends meet we would call on the Jehovah-Jireh or "the Lord will provide". Because God always provides for our needs at the appropriate time. Abraham named the place on the mountain where he was ready to sacrifice his beloved son Isaac "The Lord will Provide", because at the last moment God provided a ram to sacrifice in place of Isaac.(Gen 22:1-19)

Here are some other Hebrew names of God that we can call on at the appropriate times:

El Shaddai- "God all sufficient" This could be used in unison with Jehovah-Jireh because God supplies all our needs at the prescribed time according to His riches and Glory in Christ.

Jehovah-Nissi- "The Lord our Banner" This often refers to the banner of God on the battlefield. His banner over us signifies His presence, His power and His provision. Remember Songs 2:4 which refers to His banner over me is love?

Jehovah-Shalom- "The Lord our Peace" The way we gain God's peace over our lives is by trusting Christ and obedience to His commands which results in a 'wholeness' in our relationship with God and with others. Sometimes this is called a 'peace that surpasses all understanding'.(Romans 5:1)

El Elyon- "The most high God" God is sovereign which means that God is in charge of the entire universe ALL the time. God is so in control of our lives that nothing can happen without His permission.(Psalm 57:2) No fortunes, evil dictator's plans or worldly circumstances can thwart His plans.

Continue to pray to God in thanksgiving and worship, but know you can also hide your troubles and fears in Him and have peace that He is able to meet the needs of His children.

Witchcraft and the Bible.

Well Saturday Night Live had to do it. The news reports that they spoofed Christine O'Donnell Witchcraft confession. Republicans say it is not fair for Democrats to use the past history of candidates, but isn't that the way politics are played. To be a politician, one must keep their lives clean from anything that can be used against them such as whether Bill Clinton inhaled or not. POLITICS seems to be the devil's playground these days.

What does the Bible have to say about all of this hocus pocus?

Exodus 22:18 explains in its section of public responsibility "thou should not suffer a witch to live" The Salem Witch Trials went overboard and did not suffer any woman to live and thus we lost valuable folk cures for ailments. Those tried and true home cures bit the dust or one could be seen as a witch able to cure people of sicknesses.

Deuteronomy 18:10-12 under the section of detestable practices tells us "There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire (child sacrifice), or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch. Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer. For all that do these things are an abomination unto the Lord; and because of these abominations the Lord thy God doth drive them out before thee."

It is clear that witches were recognized as people not sanctioned by God. Whether they had real power or not did not matter. They were not the type of persons for God's people to hang around with. I always found the story of the Witch of Endor funny. Saul himself had put a prohibition (actually expelled them from Israel) on going to furtune tellers, but when he needed a wise word he went to a witch to help him to contact Samuel who was dead. He needed Saul's counsel in a matter bothering him. The Philistine Army had set up against Saul and he was frightened by their number, so he consulted the Witch of Endor. To me, when the witch was able to raise the spirit of Samuel from the dead, she seemed shocked herself. The spirit of Samuel spoke to Saul and told him "tomorrow you and your sons will be with me." 1 Samuel 28:1ff.

It is clear through the words of the Bible that there was a such thing as witches. 1 Samuel 15:23 states that "rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubborness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the Lord, he hath also rejected thee from being king." This was Samuel speaking to Saul before Saul banned withcraft. Now we may know why he chose to do so.

We often state that the Old Testament is of a time so far removed until it cannot be used in the 21st century in the same way. Let's look at how witchcraft was viewed in the New Testament and see if it can be applied to life today.

In Galatians 5:16-21. a section of the chapter begins speaking about life by the Spirit. The people are told to live by the Spirit. Then a list follows telling the reader the acts of a sinful nature which are obvious: "sexual immorality (adultery), impurity and debauchery (fornication), idolatry and witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy,murders, drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God."

What does this word "witchcraft" really mean in Galatians? It is defined as pharmakeia from medication (pharmacy), by extension magic or sorcery. It signified the use of medicine, drugs, spells; then, poisoning, then witchcraft as in Galatians and Revelation 9:21 and 18:23. In socery the use of drugs whether simple or potent, was generally accompanied by incantations and appeals to occult powers, with the provision of various charms, amulets, etc., professly designed to keep the applicant or patient from the attention and power of devils, but actually to impress the applicant with the mysterious resources and powers of the socerer.

So in essence the New Testament believed that witchcraft was used more or less for the sorcerer to be seen or held in high esteem by those seeking them out. The trick was "I can help you with MY powers" which of course was contrary to the fact that it is to God we look to for help.

There is a form of witchcraft practiced on others today. When people spend a majority of their time figuring out how to manipulate people into doing their bidding by hook or crook. They find ways to get you under their spell.

As Halloween approaches, many Christians will rail against the paganism associated (they believe is pagan. Do a study on the origin of Halloween [or maybe I will for you in another post]) of this time. One day of dress up for kids ususally allowing for play and imagination is seen as courting the devil. In truth, we do far more damage then the Halloween candy fest by our trying to make ourselves into gods each day and by disobeying His word which he likens to witchcraft.

Today, many people are turning to the 'religion' of Wiccan. It is one of the fastest growing religions of the 21st century. We must ask ourselves why would someone seek such a religion with a stigma. We are quick to say because they are 'evil' but many people will tell you that they are looking for a religion of peace, harmony and love. We must ask ourselves is this the face of Christianity today (peace, harmony, love)?

So today we have vampires, witches and socerers and Christians fighting in the political arena. Who is left to spread the Good News of God?

Biblical Numerics

Numbers have a great significance in the Bible. Many preachers and many teachers of the Bible fail to notice God's use of numbers or just do not bother to teach this truth. Because the significance of numbers in the Bible has been ignored by the church, Satan has claimed authority in the use of numbers with his own twisted, distorted, counterfeit use of number and ensnaring many people into believing in a false Numerology. Because numerology is more associated with the occult and psychics, the church has thrown the baby out with the bath water and completely turned away from the significance of God's use of numbers. I will talk about numbers and how they relate to the Bible. With anything we use or come into contact with in our lives; God should always remain our number one and complete source of our faith and trust.

ONE: It is the perfect symbol of unity. The number one is what we call the ordinal number of primacy. God is in the prime position also. He rules, he reigns, and he has all power. God is made up of no other number. Every other number is made up of one (it is in every other number), the number one needs nothing else to make it complete just like God does not need anything else to make him complete.

TWO: The first number we come to that can be divided, it represents division or difference or the second witness; second opinion or another point of view. On the second day of creation, the waters were divided from the waters by the firmament (division) It speaks of differences, i.e. heaven and hell, good and evil, life and death, saints and sinners.

THREE: In the Bible 3 is always the number of divine manifestation = The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. The 3 basic attributes of God- He is omniscient (all knowing) omnipresent (everywhere present), omnipotent (all powerful). Time is divided into 3 parts = past, present, and future. All of creation reflects Triune nature of God. He created 3 kingdoms of matter = animal, vegetable, mineral. Three forms in which matter exists = solid, liquid, and gas. Three things that last forever = faith, hope, and love.

FOUR: is always the world number. It is the number that speaks to the international scene. In our physical world there are 4 directions = north, south, east, and west. There are 4 seasons = spring, summer, fall, and winter. In Genesis 2:10 there are 4 heads of the river coming out of the Garden of Eden and symbolically heading towards the ends of the earth.

FIVE: Is always the number of grace. In Exodus 13:18 it tells us the children of Israel came out of Egypt "harnessed." Actually, in Hebrew (the language the Old Testament was written in) says that they came out "ranked in fives." They came out in fives because it was the grace of God that delivered them from Egypt. David chose 5 smooth stones to defeat Goliath. God has a five fold ministry = apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors, teachers (Ephesians 4:7-11). The Tabernacle was a picture of the grace of God. The Holy Anointing Oil used to anoint the Tabernacle had 5 components = myrrh, sweet cinnamon, sweet calmus, cassia, and olive oil (Exodus 30:23-24).

SIX: Is the number of man. Man was created on the sixth day. Six is short of seven which we will see represents perfection. So man is forever incomplete until he meets Christ and becomes complete in him. In Revelation the number 666 is speaking of the satanic trinity = the devil, the anti-Christ, and the false prophet. In Genesis 18 Abraham asks the Lord 6 times to spare the city of Sodom. NOTE when man(6) asks or seeks help from man(6) instead of God in effect leaning on the arm of flesh: 6x6=36. If you add all the numbers 1 through 36, that is the totality of man's help, and you get 666.

SEVEN: Is always the number of perfection or completion. The creative week was completed in 7 days. There are 7 last sayings as Jesus completing his work on the cross. Jesus performed 7 miracles during his ministry. In revelation, which is the story of the completion of God's plan, there are 7 messages to the churches- 7 seals- 7 trumpets- 7 vials, 7- judgments.

EIGHT: is always the number of new beginnings. Noah's ark carried 8 people through the flood to a new beginning. Males in Israel were circumcised on the 8th day- symbolic of a new covenant, a new relationship with God. When Jesus revealed himself in a new way on the Mount of Transfiguration, Luke says it was 8 days after he had told his disciples he was the Messiah and had spoken of his death.

TEN: It is the number of human responsibility. There were 10 plagues in Egypt. There were 10 virgins who represent our responsibility, our purpose to the kingdom of God. Man has 10 fingers representing our work for God and 10 toes in order to walk with God.

TWELVE: Is the number of divine government. There were 12 patriarchs, 12 tribes, 12 judges of Israel. There were 12 Apsotles. There were 12 legions of angels (at least) that Jesus could have called upon - speaking of God's authority and rulership. The New Jerusalem - the seat of God's kingdom will have 12 foundations, 12 gates, 12 pearls, and is 12,000 furlongs in length, breadth, and height.
***Leslie Hale**

When you are reading the Bible or studying on your own, look for these numbers and see do they have any significance to what you are reading. I found that the knowledge of these numbers help me to see that God is not random as most people believe. Every thing he does and says has purpose if not at that particular instant than for a particular time to come.

In my family the number 3 plays an important part in our lives. When I see the number three represented at least 2 times I pause and pay attention. If the number three comes up three times, I know God wants my attention. I have 3 daughters all born the 3rd month of the year all with a representation of 3 in the day of the month. I fast for three days to see manifestation of God in my life or to receive clarity or conformation of a direction. I met a man and he said the number 3 at least 3 times and I am waiting on God to show me what I need to know or do with this particular person. Me and my daughters are getting the number three tattoo soon because it represents our family unit so well and always make us reflect on the will of God and the role Jesus and the Holy Spirit has played in our lives.

 Numerology is a tool useful in your walk with God also for growth and maturity in the word. Do not become a worshiper of numerology, but know all things are created and used by God for purpose.

Black and White: Kids on Race

"Mommy, I want my hair to be like my friends hair."

"You do? How is your friend's hair honey?"

It's long and blows in the wind."

"Is your friend a little white girl or a little black girl?"

"She's white and she is so pretty. Her hair is soft and long and blows in the wind. I want hair like hers."

At the beginning of this conversation I knew in what direction it was going to go. I wasn't prepared, but I was prepared. I had been there myself long ago.

It is what happens to little preschool black girls all across America. Many people will not admit it and a lot of little girls know through covert signals they better not even ask their parents the question "WHY AM I BLACK AND MY FRIEND IS WHITE WITH LONG HAIR?"

Tonight I watched Anderson Cooper as he so valiantly tried to tackle the race issue head on. He asked several young black and white children a group of questions using cartoon like figures of little girls ranging in color from white to dark brown.

The kids were asked which kid was bad, ugly, dumb and who do adults think are bad, ugly etc. Overwhelmingly the darkest brown child cartoon drawing was considered ugly, bad, and dumb by both groups of children. To say my heart sank is an understatement. One of my daughters was watching the show with me and we remembered her phase of wanting to have "good hair" when she was in preschool.

I remember having the straight hair talk on three separate occasions because I had three daughters. I looked into disappointed eyes and began to explain why people had different types of hair. I reenacted what I believed it would be like for my African ancestors to have lived in the hot African climate, baking in the high noon sun and how wise God was to give us hair and skin for our particular need in our particular part of the world. I told them how amazing it is that we are encoded with that great gene that causes our hair to curl no matter where we choose to live. I drew pictures on the chalk board of the different shapes hair follicles have and which one was for black people. I explained to be my children they had this genetic gift passed down to them and they would pass it on to their children.

I pointed out different races and made a game of finding the differences that made them belong to a particular group. Then we pointed out all of the similar characteristics we all shared. Each child remembers this point in their life, because it was fun. I did not try to tell them their hair was better or worse, because it wasn't. And not one of my girls was swayed, at that time, into not wanting flowing hair, but they knew the "why" and it opened up a window for a dialogue that would continue throughout their childhood. They understood some things make us different but more makes us the same. I told them it was fine to like the flowing hair and it was fine to like their kinky hair done up with rubberbands and bows. But when it came down to it, whatever hair they had; it was attached to the head of a person I knew was perfect in every way. I told them as they grow older they will want other things changed about themselves. It was a normal part of life for many children. Black, white, red, or yellow you are you and I think that is pretty darn good.

We always talked about why and who may like or not like their features and the features of other ethnic groups. I let them know that their difinition of what "pretty" is; is all that matters. I could not tell them what "pretty" is because it is different for each individual-subjective. But I made sure they were exposed to beautiful black, red, white and yellow people. Seeing and knowing that there is not one true standard of beauty helped them to find their own beauty.

My 5 year old niece said "I want hair like my friend Bobby." Why? "She is white and her hair is long and blows in the wind." I saw a tear form in my middle daughter's eye who thought her little cousin was the most perfect, beautiful smooth dark brown skinned black girl on earth.

I nodded a knowing head signaling to my daughter: "I got this," and it began again.

At first I thought it was very sad; my black child wanting white people's hair, but I had the opportunity to talk and teach my daughters to give them a firm grounding on what beautiful can look like inside and out.

I look at them now, and we laugh. They can't imagine feeling that way once upon a time in their life.

I question how does a child raised in a black household suddenly want to be white? Is it the media's fault? Or is it society's fault? I don't know the answer. All I know is that it happens.

So it happens, but it doesn't have to remain. I challenge all of you out there to help all of our young ladies, at an early age, to appreciate beauty in every ethnic group. Make it a point to show your daughters how lovely people are across the races.

COVENANTS: food for thought

I have always tossed around how I felt about people saying marriage is between man and God. As we know all people who get married are not Christians, so how could mariage be between God and man?

Marriage is an agreement and sanctioned by God because he commanded it many people will state. I just could not believe all marriages are ordained by God.

Looking at the word covenant it is defined as a formal binding agreement - a contract. God made a covenant with Noah after the flood instructing him to build an altar, to take some of the clean animals and birds to be sacrificed as a burnt offering and with this sacrifice God promised that never again would he curse the ground. Covenant part 1:
"As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night will never cease." Covenant part 2:
"Never again will all life be cut off by the waters of a flood, never again will there be a flood to destroy the earth... this is a sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come. I have set my rainbow in the clouds and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth (Gen. 9:1-16).

In this covenant agreement a sacrifice was offered, blood ran from the sacrificial offering.

Abraham and God made a covenant that required a shedding of blood as in the Covenant of Circumcision. Circumcision was required of all of the Jews: "As for me, this is my covenant with you: you will be the father of many nations. No longer will you be called Abram: your name will be Abraham, for I have made you a father of many nations." God requested that every male amoung him be circumcised as a sign of the covenant between them. (Gen. 17:1-14).

This spilling of blood led also to a name change. There is a pattern of spilling of blood in a true covenant agreement. Fast forward to the last ultimate sacrifice of Jesus. "The soldiers therefore came and broke the legs of the first man who had been crucified with Jesus and then those of the other, but when they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs. Instead one of the soldiers pierced Jesus' side with a spere, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water." (John 20:33-35). We know Jesus had already spilled blood as he was whipped before he was on the cross, but in this covenant agreement; allowing man to come directly to God in prayer and worship, blood had to be spilled and Jesus truly became the saviour of man.

So there are several instances of blood being used as the binding part of a covenant agreement.

Now to marriage. Blood is spilled in the marriage agreement. The woman was supposed to remain a virgin until her wedding night. The marriage was only valid if there was proof of the spilling of blood."If a man takes a wife and after lying with her dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad name saying, "I married this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find proof of her virginity," then the girl's father and mother shall bring proof that she as a virgin to the town elders at the gate...her parents shall display the cloth before the elders."(Deut. 22:13-29) The cloth is the cloth placed underneath the couple on their wedding night which was the custom. The cloth should contain the stains of blood from the breaking of the hymen which each virgin should have on their wedding night. If the woman was not a virgin she was to be stoned.

Virginity was so important as the covenant tie between the man and woman until there were even more rules. "If a man happens to meet a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her and they are discovered, he shall pay the girl's father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the girl, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives." Notice the woman's name change in marriage.

In all of these instances of marriage, we do not hear God making a statement of his part of a covenant agreement as with all of the other covenant agreements he made with others. It is the two marrying parties who make agreements to one another to leave their families and to become one until death. The agreement is done over a sacrifice of blood. If a woman is not a virgin there cannot be a covenant agreement.

So to my own satisfaction, through my own biblical study, I have come to the conclusion, under threat of being a heretic, that marriage is a covenant agreement between a man and a woman and not between the couple and God.

Now, for the shocker.

Many women who have married were not able to enter into a covenant marriage because there was not a blood sacrifice to make the agreement binding. In fact, I go as far to say that the legal husband, according to the teaching of the Bible, is the first person that a woman had sex with. SHOCKING!!!!!!

THE VIRGIN A MAN FIRST HAD SEX WITH IS ACTUALLY HIS WIFE BY COVENANT AGREEMENT.

Isn't this a scary conclusion? No, I do not go around teaching and telling people this. It is just my own meditation and Bible study. But, as a mother of daughters, I shared this with my girls to show them the beauty and importance God put on marriage. All of his covenants, which he filled and continue to fulfill were sealed through blood. This first time sexual experience, at one time in human history, was valuable. Today, it is of no significance or even thought about. Who values the first person we have sex with anymore? VIRGINITY HAS COME TO BE AS LESS BINDING AS A HANDSHAKE, YOUR WORD, AND A LEGAL CONTRACT.

I wish I had had an opportunity to value my virginity. I was told not to be promiscuous and only bad girls had sex, but I was not told how valuable and honorable my virginity was. I never was told that my virginity was my word, my bond, that I choose "you" by the prescence of the spilling of my blood as the one I want to be with until death. If I had, I do not believe it would have been some sex starved boy who was thankful for sex, not necessarily for me for the rest of his life.

Couples stand before a minister and a church filled with family and well wishers promising love forever. We give a ring as a symbol of our never ending love in the place of blood. How serious would we take marriage if the couple said I give my blood word to you and you accept my blood sacrifice and will spend your life meeting that blood sacrifice I offer you. THAT'S SERIOUS.

I don't know if this would affect the divorce rate any or the problem with teen sex, but I believe it would boost the girl's self esteem and help the hormonal boy to learn this is nothing to play with.

Maybe this is all wishful thinking, covenants and all. But I do not think it would hurt if the church changed its approach in its view of sex from "its bad" to it is a glorious gift, empowering women to love their blood sacrifice to a deserving man.

COMPLAINERS BEWARE

I have been posting for quite a while now. And I was wondering; do most of my posts contain complaining? I have gone on about one subject or the other, but I would not like to be considered as a person who complains alot.

Blogs and other forms of internet media allow the everyday person to get his thoughts and opinions off of their chest. In a world of anonymity, we can feel free to say whatever we like without reprecussions. I never wanted to be one who would write one thing and then hide from it.

While pondering if I were a complainer; I began to think about the Jews Moses led out of slavery from Egypt. They complained when they were slaves and complained when they were free. Do I have the complaining spirit of those led out of bondage in the Book of Exodus? I don't want to be a complainer. Well the next question must be asked: What kind of blogger do I want to be?

Well I would like to be encouraging, thought provoking, and humorous. With little feedback I hope I have accomplished a little of what I set out to do. I hope I have not just used this platform to grumble and moan about everything that is wrong in the world (my world). I hope I have said something that made someone say: "That was something new and different."

Anyway, I know with all of my complaining there is thankfulness. I am happy for all of you who have stopped by and checked me out. I am happy to soon have two of my manuscripts published. I am happy that I am getting a grip on how to use all of this technology. I am just thankful for you all out there.

Let me share a favorite passage of mine from the Bible that keeps me in balance at times:

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time to war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

So if I have been in a time of complaining I will definitely be in a time of cheering. Whatever your complaint is today----BEWARE---- you will also have a time of cheering.

Facebook Frienemies

I didn't want to, but I was forced to come into the 21st century four months ago and join the facebook world.

As an author constantly on the lookout for new topics and inspiration for my writing, I needed to expand my resources; so I joined facebook.

The first day of friending and reading I HATED FACEBOOK and could not understand why anyone would be a part of such a community.

There was a lot of cursing, praying, farm life news (the game I guess), and business sharing. I poked around and read some profiles and discovered people really enjoy describing themselves in the utmost positive light. There were several people who enjoyed various activities, open minded, and fun loving. These people seemed very interesting in their likes and dislikes. One would believe the world is full of beautiful people doing beautiful things at all times.

Of course the picture albums with the standard booty poses and thug love poses can't be beat. People are living it up on facebook. They eat, they drink, they are sad and sick, but most of all they like what others have to say.

I DID NOT LIKE FACEBOOK --- AT FIRST.

After about a week I became drawn into "what will they post next?" Was it going to be "I am so full," "I am blessed," "haterz hating today," or a wonderful new happy picture? I was on a high because I got to peruse over people's lives and loves. It became a secret addiction. I personally do not have anything I want to share that much, but I do comment here and there.

I feel a little happy for all of the people enjoying their lives and making connections with others. With life filled with so much stress you can unwind and enjoy someone elses good day. There is always someone with a word of wisdom or encouragement, or a partial sermon sprinkled in. It's like reality t.v. on asmaller scale.

I only have a few facebook friends. One of my daughters has over 500 friends, how and why I do not know. I have been sent a bouquet of flowers for Mother's Day and have taken a quiz or two.

Not too long ago I sent out requests for people to friend me. South Park did a spoof on a kid without any facebook friends and how sad he was. I did not know anything about facebook at the time so I was out of the loop on the joke. Now I am the kid without a lot of facebook firends. My kids say it is because I am too old. I can't believe I am at that time in my life when I can be considered too old for something. So there is age descrimination on facebook I guess. But I have no interest to friend those cursing kids with their secret language codes.But exactly how many friends are enough on facebook anyway?

But as with all love relationships, the thrill is waning. I don't get the rush like I did before. I do not like arguing social or political issues; also add religious issues. Some things are too private even for facebook. I have joined many wonderful writing groups, geneaology gruops and religious groups. But I do not rush to facebbok to read and look at the photo albums anymore.

I guess I am a fickle friend. Now my facebook activity is more related to my career endeavours. I mean if I could max out and have 5,000 friends I would have a large vein for resource and research.

So, am I a friend or enemy of Facebook? I guess we are FRIENEMIES.

I NEED YOUR HELP!

Hello to all who found my blog by choice or accident.

I need followers and imput to keep me encouraged as I blog and write new books. I get most of my inspiration from feedback from my posts. I am happy withthe amount of traffic I have been receiving but a little disappointed in so few followers. I would appreciate questions or topics you would like researched. It's simple to become one of my followers; just click on the followers icon. Help me to have 100 followers by December.

ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO

I need your help in launching a new facebook group:PEOPLE AGAINST MISREPRESENTING GOD

Help me to find 100 friends by December 1, 2010!!!!
Suggest this cite to your friends or anyone you think may be interested.

Thank you all in advance and I look forward to hearing from you.

Vampire Fascination

From my manuscript "Death: Life's Annoying Neighbor)

There is no doubt we are fascinated with vampires. We flock to the movies and plunk down our cash to see a couple of hours of the pale sexy undead. They hold a certain mystery. They know what life is after death. We are drawn to them because in their life after death state, they are immune to the fear of pain and destruction. They are powerful and vibrant; able to live knowing they have no end. This can only be our dream. We must use caution in our vulnerable daily lives. We are powerless against natural forces. Watching the night roamers, we get to live out a fantasy. Vampires enjoy an existence after death; how seductive and alluring.

Long before Americans established themselves in America, people were being born and dying in other countries. As people immigrated to America, they bought a lot of their superstitions with them. America is a melting pot of superstitions. If one was truly serious about trying to extend their lives using handed down rituals and beliefs, there are enough of them to keep you busy until you can’t even think about dying.

Here are a few superstitions and beliefs related to death in the Philippines www.lininginthephilippines.com

1. If a black butterfly lingers around a person, it means that one of his relatives has just died.
2. No one should go out before the utensils used in eating have been washed and put away, otherwise a member of the family will die.
3. One must not organize teams of 3 or 13, otherwise one member will die.
4. Eating sour fruits at night will cause the early death of one’s parents.
5. At a funeral, not all members of the family should be allowed to look at the face of the dead person. If they do, he will visit them and all of them will die.
6. If a sick person on his way to the hospital meets a black cat, he will die.
7. If someone smells the odor of a candle when there is no candle burning, one of his relatives will die.
8. If one dreams that one of his teeth is being uprooted or pulled out, a member of his family will die.
9. If a person eats “malunggay” (leaves of a Philippine tree used as a vegetable) when one member of his family has just died, all the other members of the family will die.
10. During a wedding the one whose candle goes out first will be the first of the couple to die.
11. If one cuts his fingernails at night, a member of the family will die.
12. When a group of three have their picture taken, the one in the middle will die first.
13. If a cock crows in the afternoon, it means somebody will die.
14. If an owl is seen near the house of a sick person, that sick person is sure to die.
15. Pregnant women should not have their picture taken; otherwise, their babies will die.
16. While the mother is giving birth, every hole in the house should be covered, otherwise an evil spirit might come in and kill the baby.
17. When a pregnant woman wears a black dress, her baby will die.
18. If a person’s shadow appears to be without a head, that person will soon die.
19. Cleaning the backyard when the sun has already set and it is already dark causes death.
20. If two people from the same family get married within a year, one will die.
21. If you place a dead person with his feet pointing toward the rising sun, a relative will die

Healing Old Wounds

Tell the truth. If I were to check out your closet of skeletons I would probably find a broken heart. There is always the ghost of the one who got away, or the one you made a complete fool of yourself for for love. For some, it was the first one who claimed your virginity with an oath never to love another only to love many more. Then of course, there is the one you mistreated in the idleness of your youth.

No matter what the case may be, past relationships can leave injuries to the heart that never quite heal. We are tempted at times to peek into our own closet of ghosts to revisit those old loves to see have they changed, evolved into what we wished they would have been. We close the door in disappointment beating ourselves for wondering. The wound oozes, seeming as fresh as the day it was born.

The song says "What becomes of the broken hearted?"

There are several choices: an angry hard hearted person looking for love in all the wrong places or a person continually feeling unloveable because THE ONE you wanted love from did not share your feelings.

I have a wound from an ex who was not truly an ex. It's complicated as most relationships that do not work out are. After years of living separate lives, I believed we could be friends. Older and wiser with life lessons learned, I believed the new improved me lived in the present and the past was in the past.

The problem. In my mind and heart, the ex has been petrified in time. I only see and hear the old version. There is no lust or hope for a relationship there, but all of the faults and shortcomings scream out. Now, whose problem is this; mines or his?

The problem of wounds that do not heal belongs to the person with the wounds. We all carry battle scars; it's part of living. But lost loves and past loves should just be that: PAST. I won't win a prize for being able to be in the ex'es presence without any residual emotion. It is not important prize to win. Ex'es are ex'es for a reason -- they were not the one. And since love relationships should be built on friendships, its safe to assume that there is no hope for friendship.

Now I'm talking about bad breakups, no amicable ones. I'm not talking about unforgiveness, because forgiveness of others is essential to peace. I am talking about wounds and scars of the heart. Revisiting the holder of the knife or gun is never a good thing and should be approached with caution. I am talking about taking care of yourself first in a healthy way.

Until you reach the point where you wish the ex well in life whether that includes you or not; stay away! Even then you may come to realize wishing them well actually does not include you because you are not the one they want in that capacity. Everyone deserves to be loved passionately and unconditionally. Returning to an ex only blocks that person in your future waiting to love you the first go round.

Back to ex'es as friends. Do I really need another friend? Do I really need an ex as a friend? There was no interest in me or my life the first go round and I have no interest presenting for a second time a new improved me for appraisal.

I am thankful this particular wound that will not heal is one and not several. I've met many more men who did not wound me. It was one knife, one time, one person. Ever seen someone with multiple gunshot wounds? I think you would tell them not to be around the shooter. We live, we learn, we live some more. The best we can ever hope for is not to live in the pain of yesterday nor the fear of tomorrow, but the reality of today. Today there is not a knife or gun.

SEXY SASSY SIMPLY IRRESISTABLE

There have been several women throughout history who had what is known as the IT FACTOR. Their desired beauty is legendary. Some of them were not even considered beautiful but had men falling at their feet. What was their secret and how can the every day woman possess it?

The Sirens of Greek mythology were special sea nymphs who sung in a seductive way. They had the body of a bird with a human head, yet they were able to lure sailors to their death with their intoxicating voices. Later, the sirens would become known as the mermaid and by the 4th century they would become a symbol for the dangerous temptation embodied by women regularly depicted in Christian art.

The goddess Venus is associated with love, beauty and fertility. Her name means love and sexual desire in Latin. Julius Ceasar adopted the goddess as his protector. It was believed by one group of her cult followers that her hair was her most important instrument of feminine charm.

Lady Delilah of the Bible is known as a dangerous temptress from the book of Judges. She was a cunning and treacherous femme fatale. Her name in Hebrew actually means, [One who] weakened or uprooted or impoverished. Armies of men tried to take down the strongest man on earth; Samson, with weapons made of steel. But, the beauty and cunning of one woman was able to accomplish what a legion of men were not able.

Cleopatra VII Thea Philopator seduced two powerful men. She is considered sensual and beautiful because she was intelligent, charming, with amazing convincing powers even though coins found during the time of her reign (depicting her) had an image of a woman with a hooked nose and masculine features. She was no dummy. She spoke over nine languages.

Mata Hari was a courtesan, artist, free-spirited Bohemian known as a promiscuous, flirtatious dancer who openly flaunted her body. She would progressively shed her clothes until she wore only a jeweled bra and some ornaments upon her arms and head. She was a mystery to everyone she was adored by. She created the person she wanted to be leaving behind a checkered past. She would be assasinated for being a double agent (spy), but she had bedded the most famous and wealthy men of society and died as one who was desired and worshipped by many.

The list of seductresses would not be complete without the blonde bombshell, Marilyn Monroe. It has been said that she had an intoxicating quality of volcanic sexuality wrapped in an aura of childlike innocence.


WHAT IS IT THAT THESE INFAMOUS WOMEN POSSESSED THAT DROVE MEN CRAZY?

Jane Ganahl stated it best:(Looks are not the key)
Far more important is the gift of wit, brains, empathy and self-sufficiency, along with great verbal skills; words are potent, erotic, and powerful.

Men are drawn to women they think they can never quite possess. Betsy Prioleau, author of "Seductress" profiled 50 of the world's most famous seductresses and found " "All they need is a tiny bit of resistence, a little demonstration of their independence, some of their superior personhood, and the next thing you know, they will be worshipped."

Mystery solved. It is an inner beauty of confidence and a healthy attitude (not that hard hearted type of I don't need anyone) of "I love myself whether you do or not" that is the love potion number nine.

Oprah and Aunt Catherine Carr-Esters

“I’m sorry this book portraying her falsely was ever written and that I participated by answering questions…Kitty Kelley misquoted me when she said I told her who your father was…’How could I know?’” direct quote from Ms. Esters.

I visited Oprah's cousin Ms. Esters on the smae day Kitty Kelly biographer had stopped by for an interview. Ms. Ester encouraged me to write and publish my first book and I was developing an idea on a book signing at our local library (Attala County Library) in the following month. I asked my friend what did the writer want.

"She wanted some dirt on Oprah, but she didn't get any from me. I told her Oprah has done many good things like the Oprah Winfrey Boys and Girls Club she built here. She wanted some dirt, but she didn't get it from me."

Ms. Esters an author herself, knows the ins and outs of writing. One slip of the tongue and things can go wrong. Her own book "Jay Bird Creek" is a memoir of growing up in the birthplace of Oprah. It recounts the difficulties of growing up in Mississippi during the time of Jim Crow. But anyone who has met and spoke to Ms Esters knows she is a proud woman and family pride runs even deeper.

If asked about any hard times in life she would admit to such but you will always hear a ring of 'dignity' and 'we held our heads high' type of attitude. I'm sure while discussing life she would never admit to abject poverty and starvation, even if it was true.

Kitty Kelly must have realized the type of woman she was interviewing, an older proud black woman of the South. There are alot of denials when it comes to life in the south; past, present, and future.

A photo of Oprah hugging the neck of her older cousin is proudly displayed in Ms. Esters home. There are beautiful full genetic smiles.

Fame and celebrity biographies are meant to tear families apart, but I hope these family members can weather the storm.

After reading an early draft of Jay Bird Creek and My Recollections, Oprah Winfrey wrote to her cousin Katharine Carr Esters and said, "Now I know where our strength comes from This is indeed a story of remarkable strength, not to mention stubbornness, imagination, courage, and just plain hard work -- all of them essential traits for a poor black girl trying to survive the Depression in Jim Crow Mississippi. In the end, Esters did much more than survive: She used her own struggle as a model to help others fighting to preserve their dignity and place in the world. This is a story of one woman's political awakening. After learning the principles of organizing in the midst of the Civil Rights struggle in Milwaukee, she retuned to Mississippi, where she has served on the state's Mental Health Board of Directors, on its Probation and Parole Board, and on its Governor's Advisory Council. In one way or another, Katharine Carr Esters has spent all of her 82 years struggling, working, fighting to give people -- black people, most obviously, but all people, especially women and the poor -- a full stake in life. This has been a life that has mattered."

Rhymes from another time

Sometimes when an active thunderstorm rolls into our community, we lose electricity to a fallen branch. All technology comes to a standstill. Televisions are silenced. Computers are in a coma. What is left is for the family to entertain ourselves and it is usually me, by popular demand, who fills the space with tall tales of years past. From a young age to impending adulthood, my girls have never tired of my stories.

Once when the electricity was off it was during daylight hours on a lazy Sunday afternoon. My middle child had the brilliant idea of going through my senior memory book. I knew there would be jokes and jeering at my expense. I also wanted to visit for a moment that pubescent teen all full of something to see how much I had changed.

Page after page of torture I laughed with my children as they laughed at my hilarious youth. I relived times I thought were detestable and realized they were "the good ole days."

Hairstyles have changed along with favorite songs. Pick up lines from eager young men do not rhyme anymore. No thought or preparation for how to win the affection of the fairer sex. The little gang, made up of five girls I belonged to existed in name only (The Black Widow Spiders). There was no violence just a way to try to seem exclusive and popular with what we considered a cool name.

Football season as well as basketball season was truly spent cheering on the team. Now teens gather in the dark secret places hoping to make love connections. Times have changed that is for sure. But what is old is new again it is just the book cover that has changed.

Kids still strive to be popular but now it is at someone else's expense. to hear that suicides results from severe bullying makes me wish my kids were part of the good ole days. I still see kids practicing the latest dance and they sing the latest song. Dances now-a-days is to send the message "Hey look at me I'm sexy" and the lyrics to their music is a competition of vulgarity.

Well when the twist and rock and roll entered the scene parents believed the youth were going to hell. It is still the same now, people believe hip hop will kill.

I lived and survived the world spinning out of control with sin. And somehow someway our kids will make it too.

So here is a peek into my 17 year old life. I promise you I have matured but when I read this I smile with delight.

PERFECT MAN PRAYER----By Dorothy, 1983.

Lord help my searching eyes to see
That special man who’s right for me
Lord also help my wondering mind
To find that man who’s oh so kind
Lord bless him with good looks and charm
A gentle heart and loving arms
One who give good lovin all day long
Sexy, caring, nice and strong
Lord once I get him if I do
Make his love for me pure and true
Lord bless with an everlasting love
The kind that’s sent only from above
May we blend together like bread and meat
Make him nor me ever desire to cheat
Lord make his kiss as sweet as honey
I wouldn’t mind if he had some money
If things don’t work out on my own I’ll find another
Because there is nothing like a steady lover.

Past Imperfect

Last year while talking to a male friend of mine in Seminary, he told me how much he loved Facebook and he had hundreds of friends who he kept in touch with. Many of his friends were people he had met while serving in the Army. This notion of people I had met while in the Army sent chills up my spine. I told him I would not want the people I had known while in the Army contacting me. During those Army days I was a different person. And I wanted that different person from my past to stay in my past.

Fast forward to the present.

I joined Facebook last month. While searching for names of people I knew, I ran across an old Army buddy. I sent this person a private message titled "I think I know you." I reminded the person of my maiden name and where exactly I thought we had met. If this was the person, I really didn't think they would want to contact me. In a preemptive move I said they didn't have to reply, but left my e-mail address just in case. Two days later and I have not received a reply. I knew this would be the case.

I began to think a lot about the people I had interacted with in my youth and came up with this answer: I don't believe any of my past acquaintances would want to play catch up with me. NOT A PLEASANT THOUGHT.

I have been a lone wolf most of my life never trying to make deep connections with others. I never even try to remember any one's name. Faces I never forget; names never stick in my mind. I have ran from bumping into people in public places because I did not remember their name. When trapped and someone remembers me and I can not for the life of me remember their name, I just play along like I do. My children have shook their heads in utter astonishment at me recounting the past with people whose name I could not recall.

I have dodged people who in the past I was not so pleasant to. They, on the other hand have seemed to have forgotten that I paid little or no attention to them.

Even though I was not necessarily mean or evil in my past, I was young and dumb making one embarrassing mistake after the other. Growing up is such a hands on process and can be very messy. Needless to say, my education in life came through trial and error. And I do not want to bump into errors of my past. To say the least I was past imperfect. I would like it if no one could remember any of those growing pains they witness me going through or were involved in.

So, what about the people in my life today? Well, I'm still a lone wolf not making lasting friendships, but I have slowed down on making mistakes through trial and error. Marriage adds a lot of stability in a life, so does motherhood. Leaving behind your youthful experimenting twenties makes a big difference too.

By the way, that person from my past I contacted, I had to say 'I'm sorry' to them on more than one occasion. I'm sure I left a bad taste in their mouth. I am probably something to them better left in the past.

I believe many of us have been PAST IMPERFECT if we were to really think about it. I am just glad I get a chance to be FUTURE PERFECT or at least BETTER.